my imperfect sabbatical

this is exactly what I wanted my 100th letter to be: a wrap up about my sabbatical. In this letter, I tried to answer questions about my sabbatical hoping it inspires you in some way.

Dear You,

I took an 18 months sabbatical and... it has finally come to an end 🥳, I can't believe it's been 18 months already. Back in June, I wrote this letter about wanting to rest, recharge, and share what I've learned. Reflecting now, I realise I ended up sharing more than resting—shifting from public spaces to more private ones, real-life connections, and select communities.

Many people asked me questions about my sabbatical, and I will do my best to address them here in this letter. But before we explore all that, let's start from the beginning with definitions.

a sabbatical: meaning

• an extended period of time intentionally spent on something that's not your routine job.

• a period of time when college or university teachers are allowed to stop their usual work in order to study or travel, usually while continuing to be paid.

• “a break from work” during which employees can pursue their interests, like traveling, writing, research, volunteering or other activities (or even rest).

• a leave usually taken every seventh year.

These were definitions that resonated with me. I wanted to do other things outside of my routine work, after not taking an actual break for 10 years of my career 🥹.

my plan:

If you read the announcement letter, you'll see a part where I stated my simple plan:

"My plan is simple: rest, travel, explore, and share."

Technically, I summed that up into 3 core things: rest, explore, and share.

what I didn't do:

I didn't rest enough, in my opinion. I thought I would rest more, but I didn't realise how stressful "sharing" and "exploring" would be. My planning wasn't as effective as it should have been. I was thrown into extensive travel and teaching, and before I knew it, I was exhausted—happy and fulfilled, but exhausted!

what I did:

1. I traveled: Gosh! I travelled. There was a specific time when I traveled to 6 countries, 12 cities, in just 2 weeks teaching and sharing knowledge. My body paid the price. But I also traveled for fun and pleasure. I'll never forget staying in a hotel where I was the youngest guest, and they sang me a beautiful birthday song. During that trip, I met a stranger at the beach who shared fascinating stories of his African voyages though we never exchanged contact information. I learned a new way to sing birthday songs, saw a wonder of the world, immersed myself in different cultures. I got to see new worlds, and it was all so beautiful.

2. I taught: I delivered guest lectures, workshops, and talks at leading institutions including Yale, New Parsons School of Design, Cambridge, Forbes, etc. I taught a Dream VC cohort, created a branding and comms course with students who are VCs, a C-level executives, and founders across 5 countries. I spoke at several events, and mentored several amazing women through WIMBIZ and She Leads Africa. I also nurtured a beautiful community where we pushed each other towards our goals, and people achieved amazing feats!

3. I gave a TEDx talk that aligned perfectly with my values. You can watch it here. I loved that I lived—and continue to live—the message I shared.

4. I rediscovered reading. I loved this one! I read leisurely, for self-improvement, and academically. It had been years since I read so much. Some books shifted my perspective, others helped build character. I particularly loved "make your bed" and Bozoma Saint John's "The Urgent Life." It was so beautiful. I re-read Shonda Rhimes's Year of Yes, finding new insights I had previously missed. I also read extensively for an exam that I had to write at least 3 times to hit my target score.

5. I worked but a little differently: I worked with Seth Godin to develop/launch Goodbids (a nonprofit platform) raising over $70K+, across 14 auctions for 8 nonprofits in just two weeks. It was such a beautiful experience, some of the best people I have ever worked with. It was such an excellent team of ruckus-makers. I served on the London Africa committee as an Advisor, building community and offering high-level strategic guidance to bridge corridors between Europe and Africa. I did a reality show where I coached 12 social impact startups on a national television business show "Fund It Forward" on Channels TV. I turned down job offers because I wasn't ready or they didn't align with my values/the phase of my life I was in. I also randomly found myself doing the most unlikely things with the most unlikely people. I engaged in high-level government roundtable discussions across Nigeria, Uganda, Morocco, and other African countries. I contributed to EU-AU migration policies at the Rabat Process in Hague. I was part of a UNDP Timbuktoo roundtable with key stakeholders including the former Vice President of Nigeria, Professor Osibanjo, Access Bank CEO Aigboje Aig-Imoukhuede, founders of African startups, and Managing Partners of VCs.

6. It felt so nice to not have a designation. It felt liberating to attend events without a designation on flyers, even when speaking. I wrote "Housewife" on my event tags. This opened up new worlds and I got to meet the most amazing people—an experience that deserves its own letter.

7. I cut my hair. Having struggled with psoriasis, my hair had become a source of stress. Cutting it brought tremendous joy and introduced me to the world of barbers—an experience so efficient that I'm reluctant to return to women's salons! The cutting process takes minutes rather than the hours I used to spend just getting my hair washed. And barber conversations are top-tier!

   

8. I hosted some meaningful and memorable dinners that sparked thought-provoking conversations, and created lasting memories. I remember one specific dinner where Rikki Stein and Parminder Vir OBE reconnected for the first time in decades and how that specific dinner made me think about frameworks, structures, formalising knowledge in a way that it can be passed on... put simply: frameworks for passing knowledge between generations.

9. I spent time with my loved ones, especially my parents: I enjoyed my parents' company, listening to them share stories about their lives before I came along and disrupted it, their dreams, hopes, and what changed over time... These moments learning about them were precious. I cherished my friends more deeply and recognised what a blessing these relationships are.

10. I actually experimented, played, had very new experiences, and picked up new skills. I played video games and phone games. One of my favorite experiments was interviewing friends for unbranded conversations. You can watch it here.

    
    I'm proud of completing unfinished projects, clearing clutter, making new friends, and maintaining old friendships. I truly surrendered to my sabbatical year and am grateful for every lesson and gift it brought.

what I learned:

Twelve months into my sabbatical, I spoke to Ezra Olubi about his sabbatical experience and he emphasised the importance of intentionality, making me realise: I didn't plan enough. While I knew what I wanted to do, I had not prioritised rest and leisure as much as I intended. I was too ambiguous about the rest, and I forgot that you would always be exhausted if you do not rest mentally too.

So I made changes: I cleared mental clutter, archived unnecessary conversations, said "no" more often, and prioritised doing nothing or engaging in leisure activities with the same dedication I give to work. The results were wonderful—I slept better, ate cleaner, drank more water, and exercised regularly. I had days where I did nothing. I traveled for pleasure and embraced the joy of missing out on things that didn't bring fulfillment.

From this journey, I've gained three essential lessons [some I already knew, but it felt good to be reminded]:

1. Be intentional about your life: I think one of the beautiful things about an adult is that we're responsible for our decisions and the outcomes of our lives, so why not be intentional about them? You can listen to my conversation with Ezra here.

   He's one of the most intentional people I have ever met. I love that he takes his life so seriously. During my sabbatical, I didn't rest immediately—I rested for a month, then began traveling for speaking engagements, supporting one project that turned into, two, and then several. lol. My final six months were beautiful because I became more intentional. It felt like budgeting. The goal of a budget is to direct your resources to the places you truly want it to go, and prioritise your actual needs and dreams, while limiting distractions. What if we not only budgeted our money, but also our time and energy? Do life on your own terms.

2. Your work doesn't have to be your identity: I have never been one who gets boxed or defined by positions. I once discussed with a friend how meetings with a country's president are about the office, not the specific person holding it. A lot of people get shackled by their positions and roles that they feel like they cannot be anything else, but don't imprison yourself with a title in a bid to seek relevance. Find identity in yourself, your values, and your personal superpowers—things no one can take from you. I never felt naked without a job or title, if anything, I felt a free-er.

3. Financial planning enables freedom. Having an emergency fund truly helped me navigate my sabbatical without compromising my lifestyle. Plan financially for your break so money worries don't steal your rest.

Bonus lesson: Rest is beautiful and it weirdly frees up your mind to see new perspectives and open up your eyes to new opportunities. I feel like I have renewed energy to tackle so much. I got to reflect on things I could do better, opportunities for growth, and new mountains to climb. Renewed energy! I love how I feel.

I really wanted this to be my 100th letter and I'm so glad it is. think I'll take a sabbatical every decade or every "0" year to recharge.

This experience has been transformative, and I will probably share finer details on my Instagram, but this is the main gist of it. It may not have been the perfect sabbatical, but it was perfect for me, and I loved the experience. It led me to something I'll announce next month 😉.

If you have any more questions, ask me in the comments, and I'll respond to all questions asked in the first 7 days of publishing. I really hope that something I shared in this letter resonated with you. What would your sabbatical or intentional break look like if you took one tomorrow?

Come to my subscriber chat, let’s talk more.

With Love,

Blessing Abeng